According to a new study, your ability to appreciate your partner’s strengths is linked to their well-being—and yours. Our beliefs about our romantic partners matter—whether or not they are true to reality. Research has found that we’re more satisfied with our partners when we idealize them, and they will often work to meet that ideal.

A new study extends these findings by focusing on how we see our partner’s strengths. Personality strengths are part of people’s identity—and we often look out for these traits during the dating process: I want to meet a guy who’s funny, honest, and kind.

This research is some of the only work to explore how we perceive our long-term romantic partner’s strengths. It found that the more positive these perceptions, the more we feel satisfied, supported, and challenged by our partners—and the more they do, too. To read mroe from KIRA M. NEWMAN, click here.

Donna Shanahan, LMFT practices Couples Therapy Pasadena, CA Licensed Marriage and Family Therapist.